My idea of fast food is an elk.
Ted Nugent
Congress: If it moves, tax it. If it still moves, regulate it. If it stops moving, subsidize it.
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
Today’s Original Recipe is tomorrow's Extra Crispy.
Avoid clichés like the plague.
'We don't have the First Amendment, thank God, in Canada.'
Tim Collings, V-chip inventor
Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change ready.
A mans grasp should extend beyond his reach.
Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic.
Don't wait for your ship to come in, swim out to it!
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
Two feet on the ground is better than one in the mouth.
You know you're getting old when your vices become habits.
The job of a citizen is to keep his mouth open.
Gunter Grass
The only problem with government of the people, by the people and for the people is that we get billed for it in triplicate.
I love my Country, I fear my Government.
Did you ever notice that anybody who drives faster than you is a maniac and anybody who drives slower than you is an idiot?
George Carlin
Happiness adds and multiplies as we divide it with others.
Necessity is the plea of every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.
William Pitt
Perfection is our goal. Excellence will be tolerated.
Failure isn't falling down, it's staying down.
If something doesn't work, don't do it harder; do something different.
Duct tape is like the Force. It has a Light Side, a Dark Side and it holds the Universe together.
Annoy a Liberal: Use Facts and Logic, Work, succeed, be armed, protect your family, cherish your Freedoms, don’t rely on the god of Government.
The secret to success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he’ll believe you. >> Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
There is a race between engineers making things more idiot proof and the Universe building bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
Candy corn is not a vegetable.
Cole’s Law: Thinly sliced cabbage.
Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.
Skydiving - good till the last drop.
A bacon & egg breakfast illustrates the difference between involvement & commitment. The chicken is involved. The pig is committed.
The only problem with government of the people, by the people and for the people is that we get billed for it in triplicate.
You know you're in trouble when you have a wife, a girlfriend, and a note from the bank... All a month overdue.
That which does not kill us makes us stronger.
Those who expect to reap he blessings of Freedom must undergo the fatigue of supporting it.
Thomas Paine
Government is not a solution to our problem, government is the problem.
Ronald Reagan
Do not argue with a spouse who is packing your parachute.
A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.
Winston Churchill
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
Spoon feeding in the long run teaches us nothing but the shape of the spoon.
E. M. Forster
No weapon in the arsenals of the world is as powerful as the will and courage of a free people.
Ronald Reagan
If Yoda so strong in the force is, why words in the right order he cannot put?
An armed society is a polite society.
Be wary of strong Drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors - and miss.
My idea of fast food is an elk.
Ted Nugent
The law of gross tonnage always applies.
The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint enough to keep from meddling with them while they do it.
Teddy Roosevelt
Yield to temptation; it may not pass your way again.
When companies ship Styrofoam peanuts, what do they pack it in?