Perfection is our goal. Excellence will be tolerated.
Candy corn is not a vegetable.
Jesus saves, Allah protects, Cthulhu thinks you’d make a nice sandwich.
Jesus saves, Allah protects, Cthulhu thinks you’d make a nice sandwich.
Duct tape is like the Force. It has a Light Side, a Dark Side and it holds the Universe together.
A bacon & egg breakfast illustrates the difference between involvement & commitment. The chicken is involved. The pig is committed.
Avoid clichés like the plague.
Only in America will you find the Department of the Interior in charge of everything that's outside.
Treat a person as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat him as he could be, and he will become what he should be.
Jimmy Johnson
The only rule without exception is the rule that states there are no rules without exceptions.
Pliny the Elder
No weapon in the arsenals of the world is as powerful as the will and courage of a free people.
Ronald Reagan
When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves.
George Pataki
Don't wait for your ship to come in, swim out to it!
Be wary of strong Drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors - and miss.
No weapon in the arsenals of the world is as powerful as the will and courage of a free people.
Ronald Reagan
I love my Country, I fear my Government.
Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.
We will always remember. We will always be proud. We will always be prepared, so we may always be free.
Ronald Reagan
The Constitution only gives people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.
Cole’s Law: Thinly sliced cabbage.
If God had intended for man to go about naked, we would have been born without clothes on.
The First Amendment guarantees your right to freedom of speech. It doesn't say anything about anybody having to listen to you.
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
A mans grasp should extend beyond his reach.
The problem with troubleshooting is that trouble shoots back.
Virus is a Latin word used by doctors to mean 'your guess is as good as mine.'
Bob Hope
Did you ever notice that anybody who drives faster than you is a maniac and anybody who drives slower than you is an idiot?
George Carlin
Two feet on the ground is better than one in the mouth.
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Never argue with your spuse when she's packing your parachute.
The best defensive driving system I have found to date is a passenger leaning out the window with a shotgun.
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
No man's life, liberty or property is safe while the legislature is in session.
Time is Natures way of making sure everything doesn’t all happen at once.
There is a race between engineers making things more idiot proof and the Universe building bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
The early bird might get the worm, but it's the night owl that gets the tequila.
Necessity is the plea of every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.
William Pitt
Candy corn is not a vegetable.
Holding onto anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else-you are the one who gets burned.
Buddha
Most people eat as though they were fattening themselves for market.
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
A bacon & egg breakfast illustrates the difference between involvement & commitment. The chicken is involved. The pig is committed.
If Yoda so strong in the force is, why words in the right order he cannot put?
Be wary of strong Drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors - and miss.
The smartest person in the world does not know everything. They know where to find the information they need.
When companies ship Styrofoam peanuts, what do they pack it in?
Time is Natures way of making sure everything doesn’t all happen at once.
Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.