Duct tape is like the Force. It has a Light Side, a Dark Side and it holds the Universe together.
The true way goes over a rope which is not stretched at any great height but just above the ground. It seems more designed to make people stumble than to be walked upon.
Franz Kafka
It's okay to let your mind go blank, but please turn off the sound.
The problem with troubleshooting is that trouble shoots back.
When you lend your power to someone else, there is nothing to prevent them from using it against you.
Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he’ll believe you. >> Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
If at first you don't succeed call in an air strike.
Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change ready.
Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.
Never miss a chance to keep your mouth shut.
Robert Newton Peck
Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark. Professionals built the Titanic.
Government is not a solution to our problem, government is the problem.
Ronald Reagan
Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
Two feet on the ground is better than one in the mouth.
Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
No man's life, liberty or property is safe while the legislature is in session.
Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.
Gen. George S. Patton
Ralph Nader passes on the right.
A Conservative is a Liberal who was mugged.
Don't wait for your ship to come in, swim out to it!
Necessity is the plea of every infringement of human freedom. It is the argument of tyrants; it is the creed of slaves.
William Pitt
A mans grasp should extend beyond his reach.
Appeasers believe that if you keep on throwing steaks to a tiger, the tiger will become a vegetarian.
Heywood Broun
It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too.
Those who expect to reap he blessings of Freedom must undergo the fatigue of supporting it.
Thomas Paine
Appeasers believe that if you keep on throwing steaks to a tiger, the tiger will become a vegetarian.
Heywood Broun
Did you ever notice that anybody who drives faster than you is a maniac and anybody who drives slower than you is an idiot?
George Carlin
Treat a person as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat him as he could be, and he will become what he should be.
Jimmy Johnson
Time is Natures way of making sure everything doesn’t all happen at once.
Do not meddle in the affairs of Dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
The blackest lie is a lie that is half a truth.
Never pull the same trick twice, unless they are expecting it. Then pull the same trick twice.
The attempt to silence a man is the greatest honor you can bestow on him. It means that you recognize his superiority over yourself.
Joseph Sobran
Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars and he’ll believe you. >> Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
When you are in it up to your ears, keep your mouth shut.
You know you're getting old when your vices become habits.
Cole’s Law: Thinly sliced cabbage.
The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at in times of challenge and controversy.
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
An optimist believes this is the best of all possible worlds. A pessimist fears this to be true.
The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self-restraint enough to keep from meddling with them while they do it.
Teddy Roosevelt
Cole’s Law: Thinly sliced cabbage.
Eunuch: A man who has had his works cut out for him.
Toni Hinton
To a Believer no proof is necessary. To a Skeptic no amount of proof is sufficient.
The only rule without exception is the rule that states there are no rules without exceptions.
Pliny the Elder
That which does not kill us only delays the inevitable.
We cannot protect liberty by restricting it.
Bob Chmara
Duct tape is like the Force. It has a Light Side, a Dark Side and it holds the Universe together.