They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist....
Gen. John Sedgewick
The job of a citizen is to keep his mouth open.
Gunter Grass
Those who expect to reap he blessings of Freedom must undergo the fatigue of supporting it.
Thomas Paine
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government!
If Yoda so strong in the force is, why words in the right order he cannot put?
Jesus saves, Allah protects, Cthulhu thinks you’d make a nice sandwich.
It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too.
Never argue with your spuse when she's packing your parachute.
Disney World - a people trap operated by a mouse.
The more laws, the less justice.
Cicero
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Those who expect to reap he blessings of Freedom must undergo the fatigue of supporting it.
Thomas Paine
To a Believer no proof is necessary. To a Skeptic no amount of proof is sufficient.
We will always remember. We will always be proud. We will always be prepared, so we may always be free.
Ronald Reagan
The best defensive driving system I have found to date is a passenger leaning out the window with a shotgun.
Society is safer when the criminals don't know who's armed.
Disney World - a people trap operated by a mouse.
If something doesn't work, don't do it harder; do something different.
An armed society is a polite society.
The only rule without exception is the rule that states there are no rules without exceptions.
Pliny the Elder
I like you, but I wouldn't want to see you working with subatomic particles.
Eunuch: A man who has had his works cut out for him.
Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped.
I love my Country, I fear my Government.
The secret to success is sincerity. Once you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
Laugh and the world laughs with you, snore and you sleep alone.
Failure isn't falling down, it's staying down.
Claustrophobia: A Texan in Rhode Island.
A mans grasp should extend beyond his reach.
It used to be only death and taxes were inevitable. Now, of course, there's shipping and handling, too.
If I told you once, I told you a million times, don't exaggerate!
We must remember that a right lost to one is lost to all.
William Ralph Inge
The nine scariest words in the English language are 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help.'
Ronald Reagan
Treat a person as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat him as he could be, and he will become what he should be.
Jimmy Johnson
It makes sense. Not to me, but it makes sense.
It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for.
Will Rodgers
Virus is a Latin word used by doctors to mean 'your guess is as good as mine.'
Bob Hope
Never pull the same trick twice, unless they are expecting it. Then pull the same trick twice.
It makes sense. Not to me, but it makes sense.
An armed society is a polite society.
Yield to temptation; it may not pass your way again.
There is a race between engineers making things more idiot proof and the Universe building bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning.
An optimist believes this is the best of all possible worlds. A pessimist fears this to be true.
Why is 'abbreviation' such a long word?
Be wary of strong Drink. It can make you shoot at tax collectors - and miss.
If God had intended for man to go about naked, we would have been born without clothes on.
Annoy a Liberal: Use Facts and Logic, Work, succeed, be armed, protect your family, cherish your Freedoms, don’t rely on the god of Government.
When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves.
George Pataki